Friday, October 31, 2014

Charlie Brown's Style Consultant

(sorry it's a bit late today guys)


Fun Family Project:  Print these designs and cut them out.  Tonight, when watching It's The Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown, periodically hold one of the other designs up in front of Charlie on screen to see which you like best.

Thursday, October 30, 2014

Maureen the Beaver-Goldfish


Incidentally, my children now disavow all knowledge of the curious Beaver-Goldfish.

And yes, I know I should have said "Tarzan legend," not "Tarzan myth."  Whatever.

Tuesday, October 28, 2014

Souper Hero



This is what happens when Bruce and Alfred have a fight because Bruce SAYS he'll be home for dinner, but then he gets all caught up dealing with the Riddler or whatever, and he forgets to call, and so the elaborate dinner Alfred has prepared is burned, or cold, or otherwise ruined, and Bruce tries to explain how it's not his fault, but Alfred just wishes Bruce would show him the tiniest bit of consideration, especially since they don't get to spend that much time together - I mean, for crying out loud, Bruce spends more time with those criminal sociopaths than with Alfred, who only practically RAISED Bruce after his parents were killed, not that that should matter he supposes...

Monday, October 27, 2014

Sticker Shock







Do you see how problematic my imagination is?  How quickly and viciously it can withhold the fun from my life?  I insist you all feel very sorry for me right now.


Sunday, October 26, 2014

Stickman Selfie

(sorry it's a little late today)


Given that he's two-dimensional, the question of course is how does he get in FRONT of a mirror to take this picture?  And, of course, how does he know where to point his cell phone since he has no eyes.  Oh, and how does he lift his finger to press the camera button since, again, he's two-dimensional.

All sorts of issues here.


Saturday, October 25, 2014

The Mr Funny Square Thing Show


Just so you know, one of Mr Funny Square Thing's imaginary friends has multiple-personality disorder, and one of her personalities is an old Mexican man who has a series of recurring dreams in which he watches my day-to-day life.  Except in his dreams, I'm taller.

Thursday, October 23, 2014

Are Your Balloons Broken?


In my head, these particular balloons wish to maintain a constant distance from the ground of five feet.  So they race to that height once clear of the cliff edge.  But you probably already guessed that.

Tuesday, October 21, 2014

The Bloglovin Incident

Follow my blog with Bloglovin


So I registered this blog on Bloglovin, and they automatically posted this link on my blog, which I didn't know they were going to do.  So I figured I should make an Awful Picture to commemorate their guests post on my blog.  So, I did.

Make Me a Preposition


The preposition is the most enigmatic of the parts of speech, and therefore the coolest.  But I'd settle for being a conjunction, like Orville Redenbacher.

Monday, October 20, 2014

The Wrong Chris


Just to be clear, the conversation ended with Kenny hanging up.  He didn't just say "click" parenthetically.

Sunday, October 19, 2014

Doonerized Spoodles


It occurs to me that if the Reverend got hold of this blog, you might be facing Awful Pictures with Wearable Turds...

Saturday, October 18, 2014

Now You See Itch...



Further anatomical note:  itches such as those pictured here, travel in clusters just below the surface of the skin.  They are basically tiny balloons that burst when you scratch them.

Biology in my head is much more fun than the stuff I learned in school.

Friday, October 17, 2014

The Ladybug Dichotomy Explained



If Hollywood ever decides to try to make the adorable version of "The Swarm," I'm offering myself as a consultant.